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The day starts something like this...
Then someone stickes their nose in your business...


And you want to tell them... well, you know...

And you wish to go somewhere...
To be with the people you love...
And work through the obstacles in your life...
You feel like a queen (or a king)...
Or that you are a world away...
Spanning the centuries...
And sometimes, there is not a whole lot that can be done about the life...
Things begin to look a little gloomy...
And that is why there is family...
Or chocolate...

...

I am not a fan of the opposite sex...

I continually remember the words from a book a recently finished: He's just not that in to you. And it is totally true. If someone really want to hang out, they will remember to call. If someone really wanted to do something, schedules can be rearanged.

Everyday this becomes more of a reality to me. I don't know why I let it bother me so much. Hey, more time for me and no worries, right?. But you have to admit that a little cuddle time is always welcome. At least I think so.

I think it is our inherent nature as human beings to seek out the companionship of others. Whether it be for friendship, a relationship, or whatever. As human beings we long to be with others.

It helps to explain the nature of social circles and our longing to be a part of something. Who we are with may define us socially. Who we are with may help to further define us. It all really circles back to that longing to share ourselves with others.

The Internet has been a huge expansion of meeting the need for companionship and social interaction. Years ago it may not have even been imagined that we could share our joys and also our deepest fears with people on the other side of the world. It was done through pen pals, but that took ages it seemed like.

I have my family and that is a great blessing. I have friends whom I talk to every-now-and-again. And I am patiently waiting for someone who isn't scared to take one step into the darkness and light up what may or may not be there.

Social Injustice

Today I witnessed some of the worst social injustice I have seen in a while. Seven weeks ago 35 people lost their homes and everything they owned to a fire. The fire started because a man (if you could even classify him as that) was mad at his girlfriend and started a couch on fire. Now, this couch was on its end in an escape rout. It was reportedly there for several weeks.

I am doing some investigation and I went to Canyon Cove today. There are emergency exit lights that do not work, smoke alarms that are either chirping or not working, and dibris everywhere. The dibris is a feeding ground for fire. Only one building has a sprinkling system and water access on hand (from a 1999 settlement, from a 1994 fire that destroyed another buidling there).

There are residents who were not able to obtain their things because they would not sign a peice of paper saying they would never sue the company. People watched their belongings looted and bulldozed to the ground.

A 43-year-old pioneer in rocket booster engineering died in that fire because she could not get out. The reason she could not get out: there was a couch blocking the exit. Dana Byrd is gone because of careless management. People have lost everything they own because of careless management.

I am investigating and I am writing a story. The Ogden City Fire Marshall has not done his job. Canyon Cove apartment management has not done their job. Animal Services let animals starve to death because they did not check traps they set. People have lost everything and now they have to start over.

The story may not matter to many, but it will matter to the people who are suffering. It will matter to start bringing the necessary change.

Finet Pt. 2

It is over. I asked if we could talk when he got home and he said he didn't think there was anything to talk about. Besides that he and a friend have been talking and they are going to start to date. Good for him, I hope he treats her better and shows more respect for her. It is good for me. It hurt for a minute and then I realized there is someone better out there for me. I am no longer an enamorada perdida. Life will go on and I plan to have a great time while it does.

Some person said I didn't take consideration for other people's feelings:
Brandy,I just wanted to let you know how rude and thoughtless you are of peoples feelings. You can still write a news article without bringing names into the article itself. Apparenty, you don?t care. Most people already feel bad about things that have happened and by revealing names to everyone, that wouldn?t have known about a situation in the first place, tends to make people feel even worse. In case you didnt' know, news articles can easily be written about occurrences without including names of the people involved. I think the Standard Examiner is a terrible newspaper agency. You need to think before you write.Once again, I'm amazed by&n bsp;the unprofessional articles that the Standard Examiner publishes.
(Note: All typos are fault of the writer.)
This morning started off wonderfully. Kari, Ryan and I went Christmas shopping for a family of six. The children were not going to have a Christmas because no one had adopted them. We took 50 percent of the proceeds from the Paint The Town Purple card to shop for the family. It was a great time and it felt so good to be able to help a family in need.

The last two days have been busy at work. People are mashing their cars all over the place. I find it a lot of fun. Today I chased around for a roll-over for about 45 minutes. Unfortunatly it was cleaned up and I never found it. It would have been a good photo. I ended up doing a round-up because there were so many accidents today. People are such crazy drivers and they don't stop to pay attention to action around them.

I love busy days because it makes the time go by quicker. Here, here to life!

Estoy una Enamorada Perdida

I had an interesting conversation yesterday with a friend from the mission. She makes me laugh. V would write me in the mission and send me some fun photos. She asked how we were doing and I think if I could have broken down and cried in her arms I would have. I miss him so much.

The other night I dremt he came back, we talked and everything was okay. It all felt so real and I wanted it to be. Sometimes it feels like he is so close, but in reality he is far away.

I messaged him today and he seemed so cold. He hardly would converse with me at all. It breaks my heart and I only long to be closer to him. That is the strange part: He is so cold and it only makes me want to draw closer... Imaginete...

Lately I have also been thinking about J. I think it would be fun, but I don't know what he thinks. Who knows... He knows how to come into contact with my number if he wants to.

Platey is getting screwed by The Signpost. It is the classic case of management hates employee, does everything possible to get employee fired. I hope Platey fights, I want to see him win. Top tier management is nothing to be desired let me asure you. He has a strong case if he persues it.

Last night was beautiful. I went snowshoeing at the Bird Refuge near West Point. It was a cold rainy night with fog. The sky had been overcast all day. I debated driving down the dirt road for fear of getting stuck. But as I turned the corner I realized others had been down the road and paved me a good path.

As I drove down the road I saw another truck. It was a white Ford and there was a man sitting in it. I don't know if he was taking in the scenery or what. The interesting thing was that I felt no fear or threat. I got out of my car, put my showshoes on and went down the trail.

At one point when I was taking pictures, I turned around and he was out of his truck throwing snowballs. I just continued walking and figured if I was ment to die in a field, there I would be. But I still felt no fear.

There are some good ones out there

So, last night I went over to my aunt and uncle's house and they invited a boy over... He was a good looking boy, kind-of shy, but it was fun.

We will call him 'J'. He live in my uncle's ward and both of them work at the base. So, they had a lot to talk about. But it was nice that he showed some interest in me. He also showed interest in my mission experiences. (Note to self: This is a good quality to look for.) There is a strong sports emphasis and he wants to do something with that when he grows up (maybe sports med or something).

Overall, I had a good time and I would not mind going out with him. A boy has not asked sincere questions about me in a long time (especially about the misssoin and work). I thought a lot about him last night, but I do not want to get my hopes up. Besides, there are a lot of things I need to do in my life, so if it isn't going to work then I do not want to be in one spot for too long (I probably sound mean and cynical...).

Finet

The semester is finally over and I am so emotional. I cried today in my final critique for Experimental Photography. Drex Brooks basically roasted me. He is such a closed minded burro. He told me I had not attended classes or ever really shown any work. WRONG! I think out of the whole semester I only missed one class.

I worked so hard on lighting, angle and photoshopping. He basically told me what I had handed in was trash. I don't care though. I know I did the work and I know I worked hard. He has his favorites and I am obviously not one of them.

But what makes me happy is that I am done and I know I did a good job. I know I learned from what I did. It is such a relief to just be able to work and not feel like I have to juggle the world too.