Becoming...

A few weeks ago I was reading in Alma 32 and I found some interesting little gems. I've read this chapter a lot because the faith/seed analogy is used quite often. The verses are toward the end of the chapter and I think they are often looked over...

35 O then, is not this real? I say unto you, Yea, because it is ^alight; and whatsoever is light, is ^bgood, because it is discernible, therefore ye must know that it is good; and now behold, after ye have tasted this light is your knowledge perfect?

36 Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither must ye lay aside your faith, for ye have only exercised your faith to plant the seed that ye might try the experiment to know if the seed was good.

37 And behold, as the tree beginneth to grow, ye will say: Let us nourish it with great care, that it may get root, that it may grow up, and bring forth fruit unto us. And now behold, if ye nourish it with much care it will get root, and grow up, and bring forth fruit.

38 But if ye ^aneglect the tree, and take no thought for its nourishment, behold it will not get any root; and when the heat of the sun cometh and scorcheth it, because it hath no root it withers away, and ye pluck it up and cast it out.

So, my thought is that if you're going to plant the seed, you can't just stand there. You need to work to make it grow. You need tools... You need action! And thus my plan was born.

I am a firm believer that by sharing your intentions, they are more likely to come to fruition. So, here it goes...

Finances:
Create a budget and live by it
Put extra money toward paying down debt
Avoid future debt by paying cash for any and all items
Start creating a savings and build it up, along with my IRA
Purchasing fast of one year on clothing, shoes, jewelry, movies, and other items (Started 7/20/09)
Avoid all other purchases unles they are an absolute need

Personal:
Idelness - Movies, computer, phone, sleeping hours
Thoughts - Unkind, the praise of man, and ought
More family time
Healthier eating - create a menu to avoid overshopping, junk, and sugars; and eat out max one time a week
Unhealthy relationships
Be obedient to the laws of the land - speeding
Drink more water and attend the gym 3x/week, or another physical activity
Maintain a clean house

Spiritual:
Read and study scriptures daily
Say prayers with meaning
Attend with earnest church meetings and classes
Seek for daily revelation and missionary experiences

Head in the clouds

Tonight I sit here on the porch feeling the water in the air as I breathe in a hint of salty sea, mixed with the smell of a heavily chlorinated pool. I think back to laying out by the pool and watching giant gray-black thunder heads roll in. Drops of rain began to dot the pages of my text book, and I thought about staying in that spot and enjoying the torrential downpour that was imminently upon us. Instead, I watched the reflection of lightening dancing in the clouds and decided to take cover.

The rain smelled so sweet as it went from a docile sprinkling to a ten minute downpour. I listened as it pounded the concrete and bounced off of the vehicles in the parking lot. The sound was so enjoyable as I watched the palm trees sway in the rough winds.

I return to reality listening to playful screams in the over sized pool four floors below. My mind travels to the future. I have a family and we are experiencing this Magical Kingdom adventure together. I am sharing a Magical moment in time with my eternal family.

I look forward to looking back on memories with my family. No matter what happens, having an eternal family will be the best Magical experience ever!

My eyes are opened

This has been an incredible week of learning and spiritual wonderfulness! I made a goal to go to the temple everyday in exchange for some help (I know... I shouldn't put conditions on God...). There was only one day I missed... Every day held something special for me, something to be learned, something to be felt.

It wasn't until Friday that I felt liberated from the burden which so heavily beset me. Something happened that morning, and in that very moment I no longer had the feelings I would have normally had. I didn't feel to take action. I simply did not care. It was one of the most joyous moments of my life, because in that moment I realized that my heart was mine and it was no longer strewn in pieces and holding on to something else.

I felt I could truly answer Alma's question when he wrote, "And now behold, I say unto you, my bretheren, if ye have experienced a change of heart, and have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now?" (Alma 5: 26). Yes! Yes! and Yes!

Today I also learned something else. There are things that we want in our lives and Heavenly Father says no. We don't understand why, but he does. At first, I didn't understand and I hoped that He would eventually change his mind. But he didn't, not for almost three years has he.

Today, it was reinforced as to why not, even though He has told me before. There is a faithful, dedicated man out there, more than any I have dated and I am not to settle until I find him. I am to live my life every day worthy of him and the children I am to bring into this world. In the meantime, I am to learn, prepare, and serve.

Apart from this great epiphany, I have also experienced a change of heart in other ways. I have been seeking forgiveness from those whom I may have harmed, even unintentionally. There are three people who have not responded, but that's OK. I know that in my heart I have given it up and I have felt a greater measure of the Spirit in my life.

If you have something you are holding on to, let it go! Do it now and don't delay! It isn't worth the years of missed blessings and spiritual opportunities. Pride is a stumbling block we must all conquer. The Lord has said that no unclean thing can dwell in the pressence of God. That includes our hearts :)

Goal: Celestial Kingdom!