My eyes are opened

This has been an incredible week of learning and spiritual wonderfulness! I made a goal to go to the temple everyday in exchange for some help (I know... I shouldn't put conditions on God...). There was only one day I missed... Every day held something special for me, something to be learned, something to be felt.

It wasn't until Friday that I felt liberated from the burden which so heavily beset me. Something happened that morning, and in that very moment I no longer had the feelings I would have normally had. I didn't feel to take action. I simply did not care. It was one of the most joyous moments of my life, because in that moment I realized that my heart was mine and it was no longer strewn in pieces and holding on to something else.

I felt I could truly answer Alma's question when he wrote, "And now behold, I say unto you, my bretheren, if ye have experienced a change of heart, and have felt to sing the song of redeeming love, I would ask, can ye feel so now?" (Alma 5: 26). Yes! Yes! and Yes!

Today I also learned something else. There are things that we want in our lives and Heavenly Father says no. We don't understand why, but he does. At first, I didn't understand and I hoped that He would eventually change his mind. But he didn't, not for almost three years has he.

Today, it was reinforced as to why not, even though He has told me before. There is a faithful, dedicated man out there, more than any I have dated and I am not to settle until I find him. I am to live my life every day worthy of him and the children I am to bring into this world. In the meantime, I am to learn, prepare, and serve.

Apart from this great epiphany, I have also experienced a change of heart in other ways. I have been seeking forgiveness from those whom I may have harmed, even unintentionally. There are three people who have not responded, but that's OK. I know that in my heart I have given it up and I have felt a greater measure of the Spirit in my life.

If you have something you are holding on to, let it go! Do it now and don't delay! It isn't worth the years of missed blessings and spiritual opportunities. Pride is a stumbling block we must all conquer. The Lord has said that no unclean thing can dwell in the pressence of God. That includes our hearts :)

Goal: Celestial Kingdom!