Choices

Today things just seemed to pile up and I let things of small relevance encroach on things of more importance. I feel as if I have failed and what is worse, I feel I have failed the people who are on our committee.

I committed thinking things would work out one way, and then it all seemed to explode in my face... I want the tears to come, but they won't... I want to scream, but the sound will not come out... I just feel "here."

Satan is using these moments to poke doubt at me, but I know the path the Father has put before me and I plan to follow it. God will always let our faith and patience be tried, and I know this next little while will be hard. But I have faith things will work out.

On top of all of this is the indelible search, or lack there of. There is a person in my life who would literally cross oceans to be with me. This makes me wonder what I am doing wrong here, or why boys don't see in me what he sees in me.

As I run too and fro, I wonder if I am doing all the things I need to be doing in my life. I also ask myself if my life is too full of "things." Am I so focused in one direction that I miss what God has for me in another direction? Do I just need to keep going?

Just breath...